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Well I Don't THINK I Have a Wedgie...
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Fantastic job on the 17th thing, y'all!  I'm impressed!  (I'll post a winner tomorrow)

I went out of town for a few days, and have just returned to a flurry of sweet little boy kisses.  So perfect.  You know when little boys play really hard and then they smell like sweaty little puppies? (remember, I have a daughter - she never smelled like this. I'm totally qualified to say it's the boys with the doggie smell)  That particular smell always amuses and surprises me, but tonight! Tonight! They smelled like clean little boys. No sweaty puppy smell. Nice surprise.

Mike didn't stink either.

So. I went to the Grand Canyon for a very spontaneous few days away kind of thing. Alone. Nice.  I'd never been there before.  It's supposed to be one of those breathtaking places that just physically demonstrates All Things God, huh? 

I've already talked this over with Him, but really? Not so much for me.  It's  a big canyon. It looks like the pictures. I was bored almost instantly. (I KNOW. This is enough for some of you to start composing hate mail in your heads - stopitrightnow and hear me out. thank you.) 

I'm not a visual person at all. I can't picture anything in my head easily. I need words. I need experiences. Not a great big visual of a canyon.  And guess Who made me that way? Yuh huh. SO SEE IT'S FINE and I am not awful.

So I took a helicopter ride over the canyon. I was easily distracted by the other passengers and the pilot, who sat directly to my left and kept speaking in French to me because he thought i was the French passenger. (My Texas drawl sounds sooo French with all those helicopter noises going on.)  I only understood "Je m'appelle Brian."  But anyway. Back to that canyon. Not as interesting to me as the people, as the experience, as the well intentioned French.

Then!  Ha HA!  I managed to talk my way onto an Advanced Level, 3 HOUR, ATV thing-y.  ADVANCED All Terrain Vehicle Thing-y.   That is code for "Steep, rough, rocky, and wild." I arrived and had to confess immediately that no, I'd never ridden an ATV.  Jim and Craig were not really thrilled with that confession. They warned and maybe tried to scare me out of it just a little.

It'll be rough.


It'll be steep!


You'll be expected to keep up.

YES! OF COURSE!  I made a few references to my penchant for offroading and rough and mud and I don't think they believed a word of it. It didn't help that I struck them as 'small', and apparently that is not the best match for an ATV.

Jim left me with Craig to get a quick course in ATV-ing while he went to pick up the other four people who would be joining us. The other four people who really were ADVANCED and knew what they were doing.      

It was rough. It was steep. I kept up just fine for three hours and did not fall off, and it was SO much fun.  The other people who went were fantastic, particularly a wildly funny woman named Theresa.  I'm so thankful that Jim and Craig let me go with them - they really didn't have to.   

Most surprising about those three hours was the amount of dirt that managed to cling to me.  I couldn't have been filthier no matter what else I did for three hours. I was wearing sunglasses WITH goggles on top of those and I managed to have at least a tablespoon of dirt in and around my eyes.  What Jim and Craig did NOT say, which I kinda wish they had, but I"m giving them a break since they are men and all, but really. Tell the newbie to WIPE OFF THE PRETTY LIP GLOSS next time.  In those three hours that lip gloss acted as Superglue For All Dirt. Remember those few years in the early nineties when everyone was wearing matte brown lipstick? That's what it looked like, but worse. Ick. 

I got back to the hotel and took a bath and was HORRIFIED when the water turned opaque brown.  I've had to drain dirty water and start over again when bathing my dirty little sons, but never for me.

Jim and Craig had warned there would be serious soreness. I nodded and agreed and smiled just so they'd let me come, and did not dare complain or let on that maybe any single body part was sore.  But for the next 8 hours I kept thinking that if I happened to HAVE a wedgie, I'd never know it because my whole lower body was completely numb anyway. And isn't that a weird feeling, and hmm, when do you think that will go away...?  (It did. Eventually.)

I was so sore I canceled my mule riding through the canyon ideas. I tried to sit and stare at the canyon. And instead I found myself trying to guess if people were international tourists based solely on their shoes. And then I shook myself out of that, refocused on the canyon, and then realized I was just staring at the clouds above and listening to the conversations of passersby.  Oops. One more try. I don't have some sort of attention disorder. I'm just not visual. I can do this!  And then some sweet girl just like me came and sat down next to me and said, "OHMYGOSH! I JUST LOVE YOUR SHOES!" And I decided she was an angel sent from God with the message of "Give it up. Quit trying so hard to be something you're not and just look at all the shoes if you want. It's OKAY." 

So we did.  She was really good at it. 


In other news, this website (and lots of outdated stuff over to the left) is about to get a makeover, and a sister site - www.kelseykilgore.com will be added. Leanne of eWebscapes is doing them both, and they look great. 

the whole book thing is moving forward faster than it has been in recent months. I'll keep you posted, but it should be out soon.

(If any of you are here because you saw a magazine article, would you let me know please? Thanks!)

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Your Comments

LaLa Said:

I love that you went to the Grand Canyon and looked at the shoes. And also that you became a mud monster. The next time the boys are filthy and need two baths you should tell them the story of your own two-bath dirt day!

on Oct 22, 2007 9:14:00 AM
LaLa Said:

Oh, and I'm not here because of a magazine article.

I am, of course, here for the shoes.

on Oct 22, 2007 9:16:55 AM
Shalee Said:

So was it really you with the puppy smell? Sounds as if you had a great time away from it all. (And way to show those guys that you ARE ALL THAT!)

on Oct 22, 2007 9:55:34 AM
Fizz Said:

Wow, it sounds like a great trip! And I know just what you mean about the little boy puppy smell - mine is 20 months old and has JUST started this in the last few weeks. He runs around like a crazy man, especially outdoors, and then he smells just like a little puppy. :)

Excited to see the revamp! I can hardly wait!

on Oct 22, 2007 2:18:03 PM
Melody Said:

Wow, I can't believe I had to get almost to the very bottom of the post to find out about the WEDGIE!!! It was a fun trip though! I'm reading a new book to review on my blog and it reminds me very much of this post!

Congrats on the new site and can't wait for the book to come out. I've been wondering if us common folk were ever gonna get to read one of your books, or if they would forever be a comment in your sidebar...so very exciting!

Oh, and all my kids smell like puppies when they come in from outside...even the girl... although we usually call them goats, but puppies sounds so much sweeter.

on Oct 22, 2007 6:32:08 PM
La La Said:

Sounds like a blast! I hope the soreness is gone by now. I love that Jesus FREES us to be WHO He created us to be. And, how when we are trying to do it another way, He REMINDS us to be ourselves! Yay!

PS: I had a bath like that, I mean, two baths, after spending the night in the Wadi Rum Dessert in JORDAN last summer. I was filthy! The sad part is that I had to wait a long time to get to a place where a bath was even available!

on Oct 22, 2007 11:22:15 PM

Hey Kelsey--

I'm so glad to hear about your book!!! I'm with Melanie--wondering if we'll ever get to read one of your books. How exciting!

And I love it that you got to go to the Grand Canyon and do the ATV thing. How cool...even if it did numb you up for awhile. Dirt--heck, dirt washes.


on Oct 22, 2007 11:37:37 PM
Debbie Said:

I saw the article on Christian Blogger. It is funny because most of the sites I read are serious which is great but I think being a Christian can be fun too. I also have felt that my blog can be a type of ministry and pray for those I come in contact eith esp those who do not know the Lord or don't want to. I will come back to your site.
Debbie aka The Real World Martha

on Oct 26, 2007 11:13:05 PM
Kolpin ATV Said:

How cool...even if it did numb you up for awhile. Dirt--heck, dirt washes.

on Mar 9, 2012 12:46:23 PM