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What I Wish People Knew...
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We have a bathroom that's a decent size, and there's a little 'toilet closet' at one end with a door. This tiny room has its own lightswitch and fan. I wish my husband knew that the fan feature is useful, and to try it every once in awile.

I drive a Luxury MomMobile. Last week the lady at a drive thru leaned out the window and asked if it was really nice inside as well. No one was in line behind me, and the place seemed deserted. I asked her to come see, if she wanted, but that it was probably dirtier inside than whatever she drove. She declined, horrified I'd even offered, and apologized repeatedly for who knows what. I wish this lady knew that Luxury MomMobiles don't make you any different than anyone else - I know since I've driven far more cars on their last legs than she ever would have guessed.

I wish people knew that there isn't a difference between loving adopted and biological kids.

I wish my high school English teacher and former friend knew I still think of her fondly. (I know, I know, but could YOU contact your high school English teacher if you punctuated stuff like I do?! Gah.)

Which makes me think that I wish my high school English teacher and former friend knew that such punctuation could actually be considered an art form, and should be appreciated. Because then I'd email and say 'hi.'

I don't like breakfast. I wish my family knew this well enough to not make me big breakfasts for holidays. I gag down the thoughtfully prepared meals, and try to smile, but i. hate. breakfast. Especially on holidays.

I wish my sweet church family knew that when they invite me to church get togethers, or 'fellowship' things, and i say, "umm, maybe, sure...," what I really mean is, "NUH UH, NO WAY, and please don't even ask."

I wish a fantastic publisher knew that I'd written an inspirational chicklit manuscript that might make a good book. I know that they DON'T currently know this, since I've never sent it to any of them. But I wish they just knew.

I wish my dear husband knew that when I say something like, "I only have seven more pounds to lose," the correct response is NOT: (shock and awe) "REALLY? That's ALL?" And not on Mother's Day, either. 

Well, in all fairness, he probably DOES know that. Now.

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Your Comments

Lauren Said:

Sometimes when I get in that whole "I wish" mode, I listen to the inspirational styling's of Hilary Duff's "Fly."
I'm totally serious.

on May 18, 2006 9:35:45 PM
millicent Said:

ok..so what is the mommobile?
lol...my husband LEAVES THE DOOR OPEN so that when I walk by I almost pass out from the fumes!

on May 18, 2006 9:50:23 PM
Paula Said:

I almost spit my tea out on the first paragraph and the last paragraph was the icing on the cake. Great post!!! Thanks for making me laugh.

on May 18, 2006 9:54:37 PM

Yes, I want to hear about the mommobile.

And I WISH HOLYMAMA KNEW that church potlucks aren't nearly as painful as she thinks. Especially if I'm there, and I bring my fruit salad.

on May 18, 2006 10:02:17 PM
Lei Said:

Yes - do reveal your luxurious mommobile! ;)

on May 18, 2006 10:09:49 PM
cheeriobutt Said:

I want a picture of your mommobile, pleeaase! Oh and next time hubby's in the "special" room, make nasty farting sounds outside the door and it just might get him to turn that fan on! :0 Yeah and when my hubby says "that's all!" I give his tummy a jiggle just for good measure! By the way....love my church people but HATE functions! Soo many "expectations" and I just don't get the whole woman, social, manner "thing" and I can't cook (SCARY) and so I end up just freaking everyone out and stuff! So don't feel bad I hate those too!

on May 18, 2006 10:16:21 PM
peach Said:

I WISH HOLYMAMA KNEW that if she'd send that chicklit manuscript into a fantastic publisher (maybe even the one I work for) and they put it on the market . . . I would definitely purchase it and let everyone know I knew her when I could read all her wittiness and hilarity for free!! Thanks for the late night giggle, Kelsey. You are a hoot.

on May 18, 2006 10:40:06 PM
boomama Said:

I had a professor in college who made a huge difference in my life, and she passed away before I had a chance to tell her how much she'd meant to me. I wonder if she ever knew....

I'm just sayin'.

Email that teacher. :-)

on May 18, 2006 11:00:04 PM
owlhaven Said:

Girl send that manuscript around to some publishers!!! See what happens...

Mary

on May 18, 2006 11:08:47 PM
chelle Said:

hehehe!! My husband turns the fan on then leaves the door open!!!

Great wishes!! May they all come true!! Especially the publisher one!

on May 18, 2006 11:12:57 PM
Addie Said:

Now that's a momma for ya! You choke down breakfast for them on Mother's Day, just so they won't feel bad! :D

Oh, and, send that manuscript in already!

on May 18, 2006 11:41:46 PM
Rebecca Said:

A candle works nicely. (For the bathroom, not the manuscript.) Maybe that's what your husband wants for Father's Day.

on May 19, 2006 12:10:06 AM
oshee Said:

HM-
I'd take peach up on that inside track offer!

You could just leave that fan on all the time. If he asks why, just say 'Since you don't know how to turn it on...'

I enjoyed this post. Made my husband actually look up from his laptop to see why I was laughing.

on May 19, 2006 12:19:05 AM
Sara Said:

I love your posts! Thanks for all that you share.

on May 19, 2006 5:34:15 AM
Jeana's mama Said:

Contact that teacher. She will be soooo pleased to hear from you. The fact that you *write*----never mind the punctuation---will be a great gift to her.
I see this from both ends. I did contact my favorite English teacher from high school to tell her I finished my PhD, and she cried. She said I was the first to contact her.
And when a former student takes the time to call or write or e-mail me, no matter what the reason, even if it is just to say, "Hey, I remember you," it makes my day, my week, my year.

on May 19, 2006 7:34:21 AM
Randi Said:

Thank God my hubby uses the bathroom fan wisely!!!

You definitely need to send in your manuscript--the worst that can happen is that they will send it back, but who knows? Maybe someone will publish it! ;)

on May 19, 2006 8:00:19 AM
Diane Said:

SEND that manuscript in NOW!

E-MAIL that friend/teacher IMMEDIATELY!

I, hereby give you permission to go for your dreams, say what you mean, and duct-tape that fan switch in the on position whenever your husband is nearby! And if he keeps saying things like--"Oh really!?!~?!?--duct tape his mouth! :)

I hope you know--how much you bless our lives--each and everyday!

Diane

on May 19, 2006 8:52:28 AM
Kristina Said:

fun post to read. thanks for doing that. great idea.

on May 19, 2006 9:25:52 AM
Carol Said:

I wish I knew ... something. Anything is fine.

on May 19, 2006 9:32:53 AM
Heather Said:

Great post! I also wish that publishers just knew about manuscripts. I mean they're supposed to be smart. Why don't they just KNOW these things! Have a good one!

on May 19, 2006 9:38:40 AM
Stacey Said:

I wish HolyMama knew that I get really nervous going to church things, too!

I wish HolyMama knew that I hate breakfast, too!

I wish HolyMama knew that her old teacher and former friend would probably love to hear from her and not care about punctuation!

I wish HolyMama knew just how fun she is to read about and probably hang out with!!

on May 19, 2006 9:55:52 AM

my mom used to order pork-fried rice from the local take-out chinese restaurant and dump it in her blue-flowered corelle baking dish with the glass lid and take it to church potlucks. people would beg her for her recipe, but she would tell them it was a secret. she's my hero, someday i hope to be just like her.

on May 19, 2006 9:58:28 AM

HM,

I don't eat breakfast either, even though I keep telling my girls it's the "most important meal of the day." Blech. Don't tell.

I love my church and the people in it. But usually from afar :-)

Finally, SEND THAT MANUSCRIPT OUT!

Happy weekend!

on May 19, 2006 10:56:20 AM
emily Said:

loved this entry; i HOPE you email your english teacher, i know it'd mean the world to her.

also - about the manuscript -- what have you got to lose? the worst that can happen is they're not interested in publishing it, but there are lots of publishers out there, and you are HILARIOUS!

on May 19, 2006 11:24:34 AM
Shalee Said:

I'm not wishing you knew this... I'm telling you now: I love the way I smile after visiting your blog. I love your personality and your look on life. I love that although you are shy in person, you are so outgoing and likable on screen (which would probably would translate to in person if I had the chance to meet you!)

See how easy that was to do? Now go and do it for all your other wishes, especially the breakfast wish because I am in complete agreeance with you on that one!

on May 19, 2006 11:48:39 AM